Self-service Posted by bender
New rules for using the ‘Self Checkout’ system at my Albertsons:
1) You must have an IQ above the minimum level of “Genetically Enhanced Turnip” to use the self-checkout lanes.
I watched a girl stand there, holding the item she just scanned, dumbfounded while the machine told her to place the item in the bagging area. Yes, Virginia, they weigh everything so they can have a small level of trust that what you scanned is what you’re buying.
Then, after figuring it out and putting her Rock Star drink in the bagging area, she stared at the payment screen for a good two minutes trying to decide how she would pay.
2) No beer or cigarettes should be allowed to be purchased in the self-service area.
If you scan beer it locks up the machine until a manager came come over, look at the idiot’s ID to verify age and enter the special manager code into the machine so the idiot can procede. My idiot last night then decided he needed cigarettes also and I had the joy of watching the entire process repeat itself. With the joyous addition of watching said manager walk all the way over to the customer service bar where they keep the cigarettes now, look for the idiot’s brand, and walk back.
You people are so lucky I’m not omnipotent or Emperor of Earth or something.